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(stomach growling loudly) phew father christmas oh uh, hi. i didn't mean to wake you. was just trying to find the loo. it wasn't you. it's that stench! i'm sorry deary. just go back to sleep. i was dreaming of sugar plums then along came the ghost of christmas ass! listen just give me a second okay and i'll wrap this right up. what is that smell?

oh geez not again... holy saint nicholas! please, girls go back to bed. he's dropping yule logs down his chimney. come on now a little privacy would begreat. i've been holding this thing since dubai. the whole house smells like a gingerbread manslaughter. i'm sorry it's the milk and cookies okayevery year, destroys me. well now that you're here dumping lumps of coal in our toilet,

what did you get me for christmas? (toot) gross! i don't make a meal of it, okay. it's not that bad. look what i found! there's another one! whoa! put that back! i was looking around for that horrible stench and i found this under the tree!

look iphones! hundreds of them! all for us! as soon as i'm done here, i'm gonna get those gifts back and you're all going on the naughty list oh ya? then i'm going to put you on instagram! #busted do you know who i am? do you have any idea? put it in the cloud with his stinky farts! you can't blackmail santa! look, kringle

you never should have pinched off a hot slice of fruitcake without using poo~pourri poo~pourri? poo~pourri, the gift that stops stinking! since we're exchanging gifts, here's one for you. next time spritz the bowl before-you-go and no one else will ever know! so you can keep sneaking without wreaking! and your dingleberries will smell like jingleberries. anything else? ya santa, hurry up i really need to take a sh....

jingle bells, your poo smells before you drop a bomb! click right here to save your rear at poopourri.com! (stomach growling)